{"product_id":"becoming-an-audience","title":"Becoming an Audience","description":"\u003ch6\u003e\u003cem\u003eThis is an admittedly extremely self-indulgent blog post.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/h6\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eI have a memory of being a kid at the Renaissance festival. Maybe my first. There were knights and wenches, kings and queens, fairies and dragons.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003eAnd jesters on stage.\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eI was fascinated with the stage jesters and musicians, completely captivated. After the show, tipping them whatever cash I had saved up, I asked a million questions about their performance, their lives, and was treated with the inspiration:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e\"You, too, can do this someday!\"\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cimg alt=\"\" src=\"https:\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0568\/7499\/1677\/files\/eternal-sunshine.jpg?v=1779680559\"\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eI have been watching \u003cem\u003eEternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind\u003c\/em\u003e on repeat for several days as a meditation exercise. Long paralleled with countless life situations by many bloggers, it feels like a useful bit of architecture to figure out a question ringing my bells.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch2 style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003e\"So, self, my love: Do you want to be the production artist or the creative manager?\"\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe speed in which this is answered ought be countered with the fullness of one's fridge, and a history of how long it has been that full or empty.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt is a deceptive question. It deserves thought and consideration. The quick answer is \"You can be both!\" and there is a lot of necessity:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIf you are an artist without a process, you risk dissolving into a mess or soulless interpretation of ideas.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIf you are an art manager without yourself creating, you may doom yourself into frustration and stagnation.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cimg alt=\"\" src=\"https:\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0568\/7499\/1677\/files\/diner-academia-moon.jpg?v=1779681310\"\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003eAbout a year and a half before writing this post, I began the final stages of re-orienting my life around a more nocturnal schedule.\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eI was seeking the peace and quiet of the long night, the cooler temperatures, the softer hours, the ease of accessing liminal spaces. I needed to find distance between myself and the loudness of much of modern life.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eI have begun taking my \u003cem\u003eTo Read\u003c\/em\u003e and \u003cem\u003eTo Watch\u003c\/em\u003e piles seriously. How common is it to have years, literal decades, of movie and show recommendations from friends? \u003cem\u003e\"You have got to watch... you should read...\"\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt is a beautiful, subtle way of saying, \"I am thinking of you, I love you\" and when we do complete these offered side quests, it is an equally lovely \"I am thinking of you, too, I love you, too.\"\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch2 style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003eIt is also a useful measuring tool of how much art one is consuming versus making.\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003ch3 style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003eSupporting the arts starts in one's own heart.\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003ch6 style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003eIn my case, I can see, immediately, the balance has been off for a very long time.\u003c\/h6\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cimg src=\"https:\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0568\/7499\/1677\/files\/josie-pussycats.jpg?v=1779681977\" alt=\"\"\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eI love movies, which I have only an audience-level understanding of. The production of every movie ever made feels something akin to a miracle. I feel like a common refrain to a \u003cem\u003ebehind-the-scenes \u003c\/em\u003efeature falls into the line of:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e\"This script existed in development hell for 200,000 years. It took another 50,000 years to secure the funding, and by the time we got to filming, everyone initially cast had gone on to become literal stars in the sky, they no longer had time for our project.\"\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis slightly mild exaggeration makes me feel better about the series of paintings I have had in mind for awhile, at least.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eI have no idea how a movie is made.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eI love not having any idea of how a movie is made.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eThis is why I turn to movies when I find myself at a crossroads in my artistic career.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eThe mystery is necessary and welcome.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cimg src=\"https:\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0568\/7499\/1677\/files\/promotion.png?v=1779682772\" alt=\"\"\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003eNot for the first time, a back office client offered to bring me into their management program. This is the heart of the purpose of this blog post: \u003cstrong\u003eproduction\u003c\/strong\u003e versus \u003cstrong\u003emanagement.\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIf I ask my friends with generational wealth supporting their artistic career, the answer is direct and simple (and because they are friends, without malice, though with a notable lack of relatability): \u003cem\u003e\"Oh, stay the artist path, obviously.\"\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIf I ask my past self, who has chewed the tablecloth out of hunger in lean years, the answer is very different.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch3 style=\"text-align: left;\"\u003eThere is no wrong, nor correct, answer, aside from \"What has the greatest chance of building a satisfying life?\"\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003eI made my choice (art: drawing, painting, writing) and hope I will not regret it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThere is a more chilling, underlying, often undiscussed repercussion.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe life of the creative manager, or any sort of main-focus-that-pays-the-bills however it manifests, offers the very pertinent: \u003cstrong\u003e\u003cem\u003eHave an idea, immediately begin executing, minimal (if any) consideration to the supply cost. \u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003eI have been in this position a few times and it is arguably magnificent on some level.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cimg src=\"https:\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0568\/7499\/1677\/files\/diner-academia-bank.jpg?v=1779683353\" alt=\"\"\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAs I tackle my television shows to watch list, my movies to watch list, as I consume books at a rate not seen since cheap bookstores ruled physical malls, I find myself at an old crossroads:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eInfinite desire to make \u003cem\u003eeverything\u003c\/em\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eExploding inspiration\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eConstrained resources\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eThe necessity to pick and choose projects.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eAt first, the answer seemed \u003cspan style=\"text-decoration: underline;\"\u003esimple\u003c\/span\u003e.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eGo back to art school! Yes, of course!\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThat hallowed workshop of new tools and machinery! The meeting hall of like-minds, where techniques are shared! Experiments exalted!\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch3 style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003eI asked my producer to look into it for me:\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cimg alt=\"\" src=\"https:\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0568\/7499\/1677\/files\/go-back-to-art-school.jpg?v=1779681148\"\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch3 style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003eAnd immediately realized another path is in order.\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eI am calling it \"diner academia\" because a few times a month, I grab all of my notebooks and shove them into a bag. I walk down the street to the local all-night diner, lay out my studies, order up coffee and potatoes, and Think and Dream.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe effects have been immediate.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eBy constraining myself to narrow production, the river of inspiration is plunging deeper. I do not want to make more complex work -- I explicitly enjoy the cheesy, lighthearted, silly things I have done in the past -- but the number of characters I want to write about is steadily growing. Backstories are coming easier. Connections between them are less opaque.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eI am quickly realizing I had biases against certain types of art, certain mediums and genres. I've been a snob without realizing it, and breaking this down, I have come to enjoy movies I would have turned my nose up to prior.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch3 style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003eI have long feared I would eventually have to choose between \u003cstrong\u003email\u003c\/strong\u003e or \u003cstrong\u003estories and comics.\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cimg src=\"https:\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0568\/7499\/1677\/files\/diner-confession.png?v=1779713456\" alt=\"\"\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch6 style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003e(Quick note: This was drawn about 2 years ago or so)\u003c\/h6\u003e\n\u003ch3 style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003eThis \u003cstrong\u003eno longer\u003c\/strong\u003e feels the case. I \u003cstrong\u003edo not,\u003c\/strong\u003e in fact, love newspapers more than mail. What I love is newspapers and mail as a \u003cstrong\u003esingular, connected focus.\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe \u003ca href=\"https:\/\/netherworldpost.com\/collections\/netherworld-tourism-bureau\" title=\"Netherworld Tourism Bureau\"\u003eNetherworld of my stories\u003c\/a\u003e is the pin that binds everything together. The monsters, ghosts, witches, mermaids and more communicate with each other directly with mail and broadly with newspapers -- this is the heart of my artistic focus, the exploration of all three, together.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch3 style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003eHalloween creatures + newspapers + mail.\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe cost is accepting the boundaries of the three and how they play together. I am a creature of free will, if I want to build a special widget or offer a one-time whatevers, that is always possible, but as an acknowledged \"this is a limited time, probably one-run item.\"\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe (immense) benefit is becoming an audience.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIf I want a thing to exist, rather than run off and figure out the production details, spend a few weeks at my desk sketching it out, spend a few months learning how it is produced, calculating the costs... I go look to see if another artist is building in this realm already.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003eNotebooks and planners are a prime example.\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cdiv style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003e\u003cimg src=\"https:\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0568\/7499\/1677\/files\/steno.jpg?v=1779714450\" alt=\"I'm really getting into steno notebooks lately.\" style=\"float: none;\"\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eI used to make and sell them, and had \u003cem\u003etremendous\u003c\/em\u003e fun doing so. However, unless your production scale is significant \u003cstrong\u003eand\u003c\/strong\u003e unless you are binding in-house (preferably printing as well), it is \u003cem\u003eexceptionally\u003c\/em\u003e difficult for these to be a product. And even when you hit these two (or three) levels, production issues similarly creep up.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eI would love to make and sell notebooks.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eWhen I was producing and selling them years ago, my studio was literally 4x the size it is now.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eConversely, my studio costs are \u003cem\u003esignificantly\u003c\/em\u003e less now, given I have scaled operations down to stories, newspapers, and mail ephemera. This freedom is allowing me to become far, far more experimental.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003ch6\u003eThis is not sponsored. The only connection I have with Field Notes is as a customer. In addition, nearly 20 years ago, Jim Coudal gave me a private portfolio review. His kindness and generosity were matched singularly with the wisdom he offered.\u003c\/h6\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAnd because I no longer make notebooks, I have gone out to explore the world made by others. I (like so many others) \u003cstrong\u003elove\u003c\/strong\u003e \u003ca title=\"Field Notes brand notebooks\" rel=\"noopener\" href=\"https:\/\/fieldnotesbrand.com\/\" target=\"_blank\"\u003eField Notes\u003c\/a\u003e!\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch6\u003eThis is not sponsored. The only connection I have with Atlas Stationers is as a customer.\u003c\/h6\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003e\u003cimg src=\"https:\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0568\/7499\/1677\/files\/atlas-stationers.jpg?v=1779717272\" alt=\"\"\u003e\u003c\/em\u003eI bought my first Field Notes notebooks at \u003ca href=\"https:\/\/www.atlasstationers.com\/\" title=\"Atlas Stationers in Chicago\" rel=\"noopener\" target=\"_blank\"\u003eAtlas Stationers!\u003c\/a\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis final segment is going to sound... off-kilter a bit, because it is. I accept that\u003cem\u003e (laugh)\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eAtlas Stationers is a legendary stationery shop in Chicago.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eThe first time I went was not long after moving to the city, when I began experimenting with stationery as an art studio project.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eI had \"go back to Atlas, browse and experiment\" on my to-do list for \u003cstrong\u003efifteen years. \u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eI either shuffled it forward \"remind me next week\" or frustratedly \"remind me in three months\" for \u003cem\u003efifteen literal years. \u003cspan style=\"text-decoration: underline;\"\u003eNot\u003c\/span\u003e an exaggeration. 1-5-years.\u003c\/em\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eThe train ride to get there, from my studio, takes less time than writing, finding images from my photo\/illustration library, proofing, and posting this blog post. (Okay, admittedly, this line is an exaggeration, but not a significant one.)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eThis experience is \u003cstrong\u003edirectly\u003c\/strong\u003e connected to the new direction I am headed in.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eEven the above heavily photoshopped image is part of this. One of the foundational experiences to a graphic design career is \"grab Photoshop and mess around with filters and layers until you make something that you like.\"\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eI have historically taken photo edits for blog posts and similar seriously. Find best photo \/ adjust for lighting \/ \u003cem\u003etinker tinker tinker tinker\u003c\/em\u003e \/ okay now it is ready.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNow? Find image in b-roll, spend 30 seconds to 3 minutes making look neat with additional visual texture, \u003cem\u003e\"ah ha I like this, it reminds me of [genre \/ era] design that I am currently interesting in. Move on.\"\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003eI always found artistic constraint \u003cstrong\u003erepugnant.\u003c\/strong\u003e Now I am seeing it as a mechanism somewhere between \u003cstrong\u003esafety valve\u003c\/strong\u003e and \u003cstrong\u003esalvation\u003c\/strong\u003e.\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eBy letting go of an incessant \u003cspan style=\"text-decoration: underline;\"\u003eneed\u003c\/span\u003e to be in charge, to be the main event, be the spotlight focus -- by becoming more of an audience, by embracing narrow paths to focus -- I am finding myself experiencing far more, digging far deeper, meeting fresh faces, finding love for new things and finding new love for existing things.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eI do not regret the path that got me to where I am now. I will forever hunger for the ability to do everything always everywhere, in the same way I hunger for a metabolism that would thrive exclusively on coffee, potatoes and jalapeños for meals, and lemons and limes for dessert.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch2 style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003e\u003cem\u003eAnd.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eI am finding this new path to be exactly what I need.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eI am growing more, faster, broader as an artist.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eI am having more fun than I thought possible.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eMay we all support the arts, in our hearts for our own work, and with our coins and attention in the work of others.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003eIn the spirit of it, please send me YOUR blog posts about YOUR journeys in art of any kind.\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePlease invite me into your overtly self indulgant wonders and experiments and mistakes and learnings and findings and rambles.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eWhat are you making?\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eWhat are you failing at?\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eWhere are you succeeding?\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eWhat are you dreaming about?\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eWhat are you getting back into, after a pause?\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eWhat are you plunging into with \u003cspan style=\"text-decoration: underline;\"\u003eartistic\u003c\/span\u003e recklessness? (But with proper physical protection... I love and support personal protective equipment! Ventilation, stretching, gloves, aprons! More more more!)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cimg alt=\"\" src=\"https:\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0568\/7499\/1677\/files\/diner-academia-haunting-rights.jpg?v=1779717809\"\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Netherworld Post Office","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":43215237939261,"sku":null,"price":0.0,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0568\/7499\/1677\/files\/ren-fair.jpg?v=1779680282","url":"https:\/\/netherworldpost.com\/en-ca\/products\/becoming-an-audience","provider":"Netherworld Post Office","version":"1.0","type":"link"}